Friday, 04 April 2008
-
Lost in Thoughts of Me and You
WARNING: Serious stressed emo venting of emotion, you have been warned!
Well, that is the end, of a few things.
A friendship: I really loved the time we had together, but now I can honestly say I am being ignored, and I am fed up. I don't know what changed, what made things turn out this way, why I was being freezed out.
It might have been something I've done, I don't know, there was no complaint. Perhaps a change of heart on our friendship, I don't know, again, no word. And that hurt more than if I had just been told simply and plainly not to speak to her again.
I would have tried to fix things, but how could I when there was no word back? Nothing can come from a one sided conversation like this.
I hate cutting ties with someone who I had many good times with and loved so dearly as a friend, but I can't take this anymore. I don't see why I was kept in the dark. If it was a fair relationship, if she respected me like I did her, she should have just told me, instead of stringing me on, letting me have false hope that she would reply to my messages.
As I said in my final note, I will remember the good times, and if one day she chooses to talk to me again, I would hear her out. I don't want to be bitter por hold a grudge, but I can't cope right now with so many restless nights wondering because of her, it's not fair. And I don't want to mistreat others because I'm hanging on to this feeling.
So, if you are reading, whether we talk again or not, I'll remember you for the fun times, not this.
A pet: Josie died yesterday afternoon, just as he was trying to fly for the last time, before falling back on my mums pillows in her bed, where she had put him since that morning to make him feel comfortable.
I was crying hard, I couldn't even bare looking at him lying motionless, let alone touch him like Mum asked. I could only stroke him when he was wrapped up in a napkin and I couldn't see him.
He was taken out by my parents last night to the cementery, and buried in the same plot we have for Emma, my little sister. He's at peace, not in pain, with the angels now. It was lucky it was my mums day off and she was there to look after him, Gran and I would have just fell to pieces.
Joey, my grans bird is staying with us while her flat is getting redone. He was on top of his cage in the morning, looking at Josie lying there. Birds aren't stupid, he knew what was going on.
Go here, to read a little poem I did in thinking of Josie: http://bell-of-stories.livejournal.com/1761.html
Sorry about that everyone, off to get read for work now, see you all soon.
Currently Listening
Finally Out of P.E.
By Brie Larson
Invisible Girl
see related
-
recommend
- recs 0
-
share
-
email
- sent 0
Post a Comment